As a self-proclaimed contrarian, I've always been a lover of paradoxes, those seemingly contradictory statements that prove to be true in the deepest and most meaningful ways.
Said a different way, a paradox is a statement that goes against itself. For example:
"It was the best of times; it was the worst of times."
-Charles Dickens
That's probably the most famous. My favorite?
"The more you learn, the more you realize how little you know."
-Socrates
A mind-bender, to be certain.
Over the years, I've come to believe that teaching is built around two paradoxes.
The first deals with creating the ideal balance between safety and comfort:
Paradox 1: People need to feel safe to learn, but they won't learn if they're too comfortable.
So, how do we make people feel safe and uncomfortable at the same time? It feels impossible. The better question might be, "In what ways should my learners feel safe and in what ways should they be asked to push, challenge and stretch themselves."
My take is that learners should feel emotionally safe and intellectually strained. In fact, I'd argue that learners will only take intellectual risks with they are in an emotionally safe space.
So. How do you create an emotionally safe space? In short...
Set clear expectations.
And set them fast. At the start of a live learning event (or even before it starts), let the learners know what your non-negotiable are. Will they need to be at a desk? Or can they be in the car? Should cameras be on? Is it cool to use the chat to ask questions? Let's face it: no one likes to show up to the costume party without getting the right memo. Preparing your learners is kindness in action.
Give crystal-clear instructions.
Along the same lines, when setting up an activity or asking your learners to respond to a question, give them clear instructions on how you'd like them to respond. Can they answer in the chat? Should they all jump in at once? Are we raising our hands? If you send them to a breakout room, how and where should notes be taken? Are there resources the learner should have open? Where are they? Again, it's about making people feel successful in the moment.
Make messy the norm.
Remind your learners that learning is messy, that it has to be messy, and that it's okay for us to see each other's mess. If you notice a mistake in your slide deck or you trip over a word, practice responding with grace. If it feels like you're performing, your learners will feel like extras in your show rather than active co-creators.
Provide adequate think time before calling someone in/out.
Remember that most, if not all, people need time to think and process before responding. Asking challenging questions is one of the marks of great teaching. That said, when you ask a learner to think deeply, give them time to think before speaking to the larger audience. We want our learners to feel called in, not called out.
Take nothing personally.
Not everyone is going to be a happy camper. Periodt. Point blank. End of story.
99% of the time, it's not about you. It's about a million other things going on in your learners' lives, workplaces, homes and families. It's bias against tedious live learning events that have felt like a "waste of time" or have "pulled people off the floor."
Again. It's not about you. Continue to ask for feedback and take it with a grain of salt.
What is healthy discomfort?
In the context of learning, healthy discomfort is the space in which people are asked to expand their perception, grow and change. It's that sweet spot between "This is so easy," and "Woah. Hold up. This is too much."
As Brene Brown says, "If you're comfortable, I'm not doing my job."
To be clear, healthy discomfort is NOT the sensation we feel when we're exposed, ashamed or caught off-guard. That said, it will still be somewhat unpleasant. It'll be unpleasant in the same way it feels to level up to the next set of weights in the gym.
As hard as it is, you NEED to let your learners do the heavy lifting.
THIS IS NOT YOUR TIME TO FLEX YOUR KNOWLEDGE AND EXPERTISE!
How can you build healthy discomfort into ILT and VILT settings? We thought you'd never ask...
Use your resources.
The virtual classroom offers a plethora of tools for interaction. Use the chat, the reaction buttons, the hand raise icon. Collaborate on a digital white board, build a virtual word wall. Just because you're virtual doesn't mean your leaners can tap out and scroll on.
In a physical environment, make use of your space. Use chart paper to make thinking visible. Create a word wall or gallery walk.
Wait for 100%.
If you ask for participation, wait for 100%. Don't let your learners opt out. If you set clear expectations at the start of your session, stick to them for the duration of the session. Kindly but professionally request that learners adhere to the standards you laid out.
Use a tone of urgency.
Have you ever been in a live training even where the instructor is OBVIOUSLY disinterested in the material? How did that make you feel?
As a facilitator/teacher or instructor, it's important that your tone, body language and words mirror the urgency of the content. Your entire presentation should say, "This is important."
And most importantly, never apologize for taking time!
Hold learners accountable.
If you believe your content is important, it only follows that you'll hold your learners accountable for it. When a learner is struggling, make sure to revise the concept with them privately. If you notice that a post-assessment score was particularly low, circle back.
Use the cold call technique to call your learners in.
Spoiler alert. This is the technique I get the most pushback on. The cold call technique describes the act of calling on a learner rather than asking for a volunteer.
Yes, it's uncomfortable. Why? Because at first glance, it feels like we're "calling people out."
Let's reframe this. Rather than calling your learners out (i.e. trying to catch them in the act of online shopping even though their camera was on and you could see their eyes light up with joy when they saw that pair of jeans on clearance), what if you were calling them back in? Cold calling on learners communicates that you genuinely care about their learner journey, that everyone (not just Donna in the front row) has something meaningful to contribute.
I was the type of learner who hated being called on. Now I do this, compassionately, all the time.
Paradox two deals with the balance between planning and responding to real-time data. Stay tuned for the next post!
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